Merry Christmas, you've been boned!

So, this guy in Chicago gave a friend of his a key to his apartment. Normal, right? A key to a friend's apartment is something most of us would just accept and never use. That is why we are not as brilliant as Adal Rifai. He took this key exchange to new heights. While his friend Louie Saunders was out, he and several accomplices entered Saunders' apartment and gift wrapped everything in sight. That's right, couch cushions, beer in the fridge you name it. Awesome gift Adal!

Happy Christmas

So it's been forever. but I'm back to the blogosphere.
It's a Christmas Eve tradition to watch A Muppet Christmas Carol. It's all the wonder of A Christmas Carol with the glory that is the Muppets. Also, Michael Caine as Scrooge? wondrous! Did I mention it's a musical? There are lovely songs sung mainly by Muppets. I highly recommend it for holiday viewing.
Here's my favourite song.

Cool Word of the Day

Fletcher: maker of seller of arrows.
I don't know this for sure, but I'm guessing this word has gone by the by because of a lack of need for arrows nowadays. So if you've been fletched, you've been supplied with arrows. It reminds me of fleeced, which means you've been ripped off.

Their Mom Must be so Proud

So I was reading the news this morning and I came across this item about twin porn star/burglars. You read that correctly, porn star/burglars. So these twins, who have occasionally acted together (ew!) were arrested in Philly after breaking into shops through their roofs. The only thing that comes to mind is the question, 'what, porn doesn't pay enough?'

http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/capress/090716/koddities/us_porn_actors_burglaries

Feeling Cross?

Crosswords are a wonder and I love them. To show my love, I will write about the history of the crossword. Here goes...
In 1913, Arthur Wynne, a journalist created a new puzzle he called the "word-cross" and it was published in New York World newspaper. The new puzzle gained popularity, its name was changed to crossword and it began to appear in other American newspapers.
By 1924, crosswords had become a fad, and many thought it belittled the newspaper industry. By the time the word 'crossword' appeared in the dictionary in 1930, the crossword puzzle trend was here to stay.
Crossword Fact: some cryptographers who worked for the Allies in WWII, were selected after winning or placing in crossword competitions.

"Nothing Beside Remains. Round The Decay of That Colossal Wreak..."

I've been thinking, why is it that people feel a need to be a 'legend' instead of being memorialized in a regular way? Marilyn Monroe is a legend and I'm not saying that she set out to be, but people are intent on emulating her legendary status. I'm curious about why one would want to be like someone who is basically remembered for a hot bod and a ditsy demeanor. Lindsay Lohan, for example, longs to be like Marilyn, even going as far as recreating her famous photoshoots, getting a Marilyn quote tattoo and having a train wreak of a personal life. I long to be remembered as me, not as a legend, as who I was not who I have been built up as. I am often reminded of a quote by a lesser known person, Damon Runyon, who wrote 'Guys and Dolls' and other New York set stories. As he was dying of cancer, he said, "you can keep the things of bronze and stone and give me one man to remember me just once a year." I remember Damon Runyon, and not for getting naked in Playboy magazine.

All my lovin I will send to you... but darlin' I won't be true

Another day, another political scandal. Like most of the others, this one involves sex; it also involves the Governor of South Carolina. The previously unremarkable governor, Mark Sanford, has apparently been traveling to Argentina to carry out an affair with an as-yet-unnamed woman. Some have alleged that he has been using taxpayer funds to carry out these trips to the Argentine. So not only is he being investigated for misuse of funding and being asked to step down, but he is also the subject of late night fodder and less than stalwart support.
Meghan McCain, political blogger and daughter of John McCain has thrown her support behind Sanford writing, "stop requiring that our politicians live at such a high level of moral superiority" and "I suggest that the party concentrate less on what goes on in the bedroom and more on what is going on in policy." I find it interesting that McCain is so quick to say that people should concentrate less on what goes on in the bedroom and more on politics. George Bush won a whole election concentrating on what goes on in people's bedrooms. Also, misuse of taxpayer funds is basically fraud, whether or not there is a bedroom involved.
Sanford wife has also gotten involved, but like most other political wives who have weathered being wronged, she is basically ignorant of her husband's life and seems to like it that way, saying "his [Mark's] career is not a concern of mine". Well, it is now, i'm sure.

http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/category/mark-sanford/

Poetry in Motion

I like poetry but I write crap poems so I'm showcasing someone else's poem. I didn't ask permission so let's say anonymous wrote it. Well, here it is.

The winter froze his love for me
The pelting rain that turned to sleet
Sealed his heart - a casket closed
The snow falls down & cruel winds blow

Y’know a real canuck
Well they would shoot the puck (give a fuck?)
Instead of taking flight
When they turn on the streetlights

The winter froze his love for me
I feel the cold on every seat
Beside the fire, I don’t know
A dusky ember from an inferno

The winter froze his love for me
I can’t help that my heart still beats
But his heart turned to tungsten steel
And I can’t help the way he feels

If I Could Talk With the Animals...

Everybody knows The Beatles and The Rolling Stones but what are the other bands of the "British Invasion" of the 1960s? One of my favourites is The Animals. They didn't have as long or as prolific a career as the Beatles or the Stones, which is likely why they are less well known. There were also fights amongst the band members, mostly over lead singer Eric Burdon's desire to go solo. I'm a fan though, mostly of House of the Rising Sun, We Gotta Get Out of This Place & Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood. I will now share the Animals. Please take a listen.

I Think Hawkeye & B.J. Would Support This

So... David Ogden Stiers is gay. If you don't know who he is, he was on M*A*S*H as Major Winchester and he was also the voice of Cogsworth the clock in Beauty and the Beast and the voice of Governor Ratcliffe in Pocahontas. He decided to publicly come out to help get gay marriage legalized. Here's a pic.


Good on ya, Dave. I just didn't see it coming. Clay Aiken... yes. Lance Bass... yes. David Hyde Pierce... yes. But this guy? not so much. Don't know why.

You Don't Have to be Here to be Here

Ok so it's been awhile; but here goes.
Paris Hilton... oh dear. what have you said this time?
Paris has called the MTV show The Hills "lame and fake". While this is true, even though it was likely only said because Hills star Lauren Conrad used to date Paris' boyfriend, whose name isn't worth mentioning; Paris then goes on to plug the second season of her own reality show Paris Hilton's My New BBF. I found this ironic to say the least. Paris does this show to make money, not because she's hard up for friends. here's the article if you want to read.

http://www.usmagazine.com/news/paris-hilton-the-hills-is-so-fake-and-lame-2009285

Another Joan Rivers Look-alike

so, it looks like we can add another formerly attractive person to the list of people who have been made identical, not to mention creepy by overdone plastic surgery. Rupert Everett, who was so good looking in 'My Best Friend's Wedding' and 'An Ideal Husband', has joined the aforementioned list. Mr. Everett used to look like this:

now he looks like this:

creepy, right?

Denial is not Just a River in Egypt

most people know who Jenna Jameson is. if you don't, she's a porn star; apparently a fairly prolific one until her porn retirement. after her retirement, Jenna and her boyfriend, who is a 'mixed martial arts fighter' whatever that means, decided to have children and ended up having twins. the twins, who are ridiculously named Jesse Jameson and Journey Jette, were born in March. the denial has come in recently, as Jenna has claimed on her myspace blog that she had a very easy labour due to her strong core muscles, which she achieved by doing 500 push-ups a day. let's be honest now, the reason she had such an easy labour is because by now her vagina is likely the width of the Panama Canal. with girly bits that wide labour must have been a cinch; it was probably like a log ride or someone throwing dolls out of a window.

Post Not-So Secret

Chapters is having a postcard sale and i bought several. this made me happy inside and i considered the wonder of the postcard and its evolution. first there was the postcard, and one could say what needed to be said without too much detail, no run on sentences were allowed. a person could say "wish you were here" or "glad you're not here" and little else with no questions asked. the postcard gave way to 'post-secret', where one can confess deepest feelings, secrets and desires anonymously with no fear of repudiation and a feeling of a weight lifted from one's shoulders. finally there was 'twitter', which, admittedly had nothing directly to do with postcards; but it is certainly the modern way of saying what needs of does not need to be said in 140 characters. my advice is to revisit the postcard in all its old-fashioned glory. write to someone, sign it or don't sign it and say just what you want to say in 140 characters, or less.

Steele Here on Blogspot!

i've been away, but now i'm back with my embarassing love of Remington Steele. i'm not one of those weirdos who writes fan fiction or even one of those less weird weirdos who has a fan site.
i just like the Steele. a lot. there are several reasons and i shall list them.
1. it reminds me of my childhood. watching it with my sister
2. Pierce Brosnan is hot.
3. i like mysteries. mystery books and especially mystery tv shows. for reals. anything from law and order to murder, she wrote.
4. it's funny. honest! i enjoy the humor of private detectives investigating cases of sabotage at a circus or attempted murder on the set of frozen dinner commercials.
5. i like the romantic chemistry and i think it set the stage for romantic banter over grisly murders, like on Bones.

Rain, rain go away

It's raining today and I am at the museum by myself because people don't generally go for walks in the rain and we get mostly walk-in business. This whole situation is making me a little sad & when I'm sad & it's raining (like today) I like to listen to Cat Stevens. Share the Cat.

Awkward!

I used to like Joaquin Phoenix. I accepted that he was kinda strange because he made up for it by being a really good actor. Now he's nuts. Even if his whole leaving acting to start a rap (I know!) career thing is bullshit, he's still gone off the deep end by making very awkward public appearances, like this one on David Letterman last night. Why would you go on a talk show and refuse to talk? Dave tries to make the best of it, but it's still uncomfortable. It reminds me of the part in 'Annie Hall' when Alvy is talking to Annie's odd brother Dwayne.

He's Just Not That Into You... and He's an Asshole

Okay so, breakups blow. They blow large no matter what form they happen to come in. It's terrible to be told that someone you care about no longer cares for you. It's also terrible (and awkward) to tell someone that you don't love them romantically anymore. That being said, this douche in England has taken the avoidance of awkwardness and love of new technology to a new level.

Wait, Who are the Savages?

Over the past few years we have been innundated with the less than kind name calling by several supposedly "civilized" Westerners (mostly N. Americans) of Arab people or those of the Muslim faith. If we are more civilized, than why can't we accept the differences of others? I would like to illustrate my point with the song "Savages" from Pocahontas.
P.S. I find it interesting that Mel Gibson is singing about intolerance.

Cool Word of the Day

Panhandle. Not that uncommon of a word, but insteresting for its different meanings.
1. a narrow strip of territory projecting from a larger area, but not a peninsula.
2. to stop people in the street and ask for food or money. this term arose from the sight of an outstretched arm appearing like a geographical panhandle.

More Cowbell!!

i think it's possible that everyone has seen this SNL sketch. but here it is in reference to my search for songs with "more cowbell!"



if you know any cowbell songs let me know! this song also has cowbell "tonite is a wonderful time to fall in love".

Super Bingo

it makes me laugh. watch out for oldzilla.